Vacation Day 5

OK... so yesterday wasn't very eventful depending on what your consider adventure. Kevin didn't really do anything crazy except using the ladies room but I guess the signs in Spanish can be confusing.  I guess the lil chick in the dress icon wasn't enough.

So Wednesday was Spa day. I thought this would be my favorite day but it didn't end up that way. So I swore I was about to get my 'Real Housewife' on, but little did I know that the cost of beauty those women pay was a check my a$$ couldn't cash.

It started as a nice couples massage. Which was pretty good. Kevin later told me  ole' girl was a little rough on him but the MAN in him wouldn't let him ask her to go easy. Dudes!....anyway the real deal came when I decided I was gonna be glam and get a body treatment. I requested a jojoba bean body scrub exfoliation. This is to exfoliate the entire body and leave you glowing!

Well, after a very relaxing massage I was taken into a room that reminded me of  mortuary! There was a big white tub with a table in it, lined in plastic with towels all over the place. On the ceiling were all these shower heads attached to this big piece of glass. I was told to strip down and lay on the table... I covered my teets and whoohaha with these small towels. I felt like I was about to be  embalmed! She first rubbed me down in this citrus smelling oil, which was nice and totally threw me off from what was about to happen. She then used the salt scrub they usually use on your feet all over me. Now it wouldn't have been so bad but this woman had the strongest hands I had ever felt! I swear this woman scrubbed off not only a layer of dead skin but old childhood chickenpox marks and tattoos! I swear I was on fire!! This was NOT the relaxing and refreshing body treatment I thought it was going to be.

But that is not where it ends! After she braised me from toes to ears, she covered my face with a small towel and moved the ceiling showers right above me and turned them on. She turned them on one by one starting at my feet and going up... all of a sudden the shower head blasted down on my chest and soaked the towel on my face. I flipped out! Have you ever had a towel on your face and someone spill water on it?! It felt like I was drowning. I swore I have seen them use that move as a method of torture in  movies. I started flappin around on that table and freakin out! She finally recognized my panic and turned the jets off and used a hand held shower head to rise me.

When it was over, yes I had baby soft and smooth skin but I was traumatized! It felt like I had a full body sun burn! So if this is the kinda stuff those Richy, glitzy woman are into...I ain't about that life! I'm gonna stick to the spa mani/pedi.... that I can handle.



the Death Shower

We are now starting the last day of our vacation and will be back in Charlotte tomorrow night... my next post will probably be from the airport...wish us safe travels. Peace.